I’m a car guy. Most guys I know like cars. We’d love to hang out in Jay Leno’s garage and take his cars for a spin. Even better we’d love to have the cars.
I enjoy the car TV shows where they find the classic car in the barn covered in dust waiting to be unveiled, restored and put back into commission again.
I often wonder why the car got put in the barn in the first place. I’m sure it was to protect it. But in doing so it was neglected. It was forgotten. And its purpose was diminished.
What does a neglected, dust covered car in the barn have to do with dating your spouse?
Actually, quite a bit. Here are 3 Ways Dating Helps Our Relationship with Our Spouses:
1. Dating Prevents Neglect
When we don’t spend time with our spouse, our marriage becomes like that car in the barn. It starts to gather dust. The rubber gets hard and brittle. The oil and gas begin to breakdown.
It’s a slow process but it still occurs. We can’t neglect our spouses and expect our relationship to be pristine and without problems. Get the dust off go out and date.
2. Dating Helps Our Purpose
When that classic got put in the barn it lost its purpose. The car was designed for transportation. But that wasn’t its singular purpose. It was also built for fun. Being locked up and protected from the elements and not being driven wasn’t its purpose. [Tweet “Not dating your spouses is ignoring part of your purpose in marriage. Fun.”]
I look forward to each Thursday. It’s “Date Thursday” with my wife and it’s been a priority for years in our marriage. It’s my favorite day of the week. Almost without exception we never miss our “Date Thursday.” Our kids know it’s “Date Thursday.” Even our friends and extended family know its “Date Thursday.”
3. Dating Maintains the Relationship
Dating is like regular maintenance on a car. It’s like a tune up. When we date on a regular basis we’re able to connect. We’re able to communicate about each other’s needs. When we fail to date, we miss things. We miss warning signs of potential problems.
Date your spouse. Every marriage could use a tune-up.
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Is the dust building up on your relationship?
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Would you like to add fun to your marriage?
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Could your marriage use a tune-up?
You are designed to date your spouse.
Set a day, a time and make it a priority.
Date your spouse…you’ll have fun, I know because we do.
This is a guest post by Troy McLaughlin He is a truck driver by night, writer by day, and a happily married father of three. He dates his wonderful bride of 26 years every Thursday. You can find Troy on twitter @thenofactor.
cj says
Great analogy, SD. We have so many miles on our car, we had to switch to gliders. More fun and really fuel efficient. Dates are great, but every face to face moment is an opportunity to grow together. Nearly everything we do is a date. We love it! Have a fun 4th!!!!
Troy McLaughlin says
Thanks CJ. I love your line “every face to face moment is an opportunity to grow together.” Thanks for commenting I’m glad you enjoyed the post.
judy sko I says
Very nice, excellent point and well written. Dave & I have had a date night once a week when we still worked & had kids at home. Now that we’re retired it’s awesome, we get to do almost everything together! Keep up the great work, you’re a natural.
Love,
Judy
Troy McLaughlin says
Thank you Judy for the kind remarks. Lisa and I date each Thursday and we love it.
Mom says
Troy,
I am so proud of you! You are a great husband to my wonderful daughter in law Lisa! Also a great father to my 3 perfect grand children. I know your father would be so proud of you. He will rejoice with you one day! Love you, Mom
Troy McLaughlin says
Thank you mom. Yes it will be great to rejoice with dad someday. I’m looking forward to it. Thank you for such kind words.
Love you mom.
Rosemary says
We find dates in unexpected places. I hate to make hair cutting appointments, so I would end up going to a walk-in place on impulse with not always the best results. Hubby convinced me to go to the gal who cuts his hair. We go together and then have lunch. I told him like hair appointments now, because it’s a little bit like going on a date. Now he refers to it as “our haircut date”.
Troy McLaughlin says
Rosemary I like this. We do find dates in unexpected places. Thanks for reading my post.
christa sterken says
Great post, as the kids get older the more I realize the importance of keeping THIS relationship at the front and center
Troy McLaughlin says
Thanks Christa. Your right keeping our relationship with our spouse ” front and center” are so important. We married our spouses not our kids.
Troy McLaughlin says
is so important ,typo
Anne Peterson says
Troy,
Great post. I liked the analogy as well as the practical ideas. I also liked how everyone who knows you knows about your date night on Thursdays.
Troy McLaughlin says
Thanks Anne I’m glad you enjoyed the post. It is a joy to date my wife each Thursday. I am blessed beyond what I deserve.
kath unsworth says
Hey Troy a great read, we try for lunch dates when we can and the kids are at school. It is important to spend some quality time together, without the little ones. Thanks for the reminder.
Troy McLaughlin says
Thanks for reading and your kind comments. Yes we need that time with our spouses because most likely when are kids are grown it will be only with our mates.
Cassie says
Good analogy! Love how you did that.
My husband and I will be married 2 years in Oct. We don’t have a certain day set aside at this point for date nights. Although we run, ride bikes together, go to the movies and dinner pretty often. We always have dinner together which allows us time to connect every night.
I know with our business taking off and kids in the future we will need to designate a day and time for dates or else we will become “too busy” and it will be over looked.
Thank you for sharing!
Troy McLaughlin says
Thanks so much Cassie, enjoy the time you have now. It goes by in a whirlwind. We will celebrate our 26th anniversary on Aug. 29th. Yes, as you said make time now or it’s very easy to become too busy and neglect our spouses.